Last night I had the privilege of spending some time and sharing some thoughts with a group of teenagers at a friend’s youth fellowship group in Larne. My topic for the evening was prayer and how effective it’s been for me and the changes that I’ve seen through it but as I spoke I felt the need to flip the topic on it’s head and try to explain what happens when your prayers don’t seem to be working at all.
For the last while all I have properly been focussed on is finding myself a job where I can use my university earned degree to support myself and finally rid myself of my working-in-retail demons. Unfortunately nothing successful has materialised and I find myself wondering what the ‘bigger plan’ for my life is. I absolutely love the verse found at Jeremiah 29:11 in the Bible …
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
… but just at the minute I am struggling big time to believe that it is going to happen. I want it to happen, I hope that it will happen and I pray that it will happen … but when?!
I’ve been reading a book called ‘God On Mute’ for what seems like forever (only because I am a tediously slow reader) but there is a story in it of a lady called Cecily who after suffering the pain of losing her twins boys 22 weeks into her first successful IVF pregnancy was advised to write a completely honest prayer to God. In it she swore at Him, screamed at Him and threatened to hit Him … not exactly Sunday morning pulpit material … but it made me realise that you can tell God exactly how you feel about Him. He’ll not take offence, He’ll not walk out on you, He’ll not punish you for being honest … He’ll do exactly what He always does and always has done … He’ll love you.
Although things are tough for me at the moment and I feel like doubting God …
“… these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
– 1 Corinthians 13:13